Blogger Denies Reports of Quick Marriage in Vegas

Blogger vehemently denied the rumor that he got married to music (so-called) star Britney Spears in Las Vegas yesterday.

"That act would be inconsistent with everything I've ever stood for," he said, referring to his preference for the single life and his disdain for dyed blondes. "I know what Britney said. But let's face it, anyone who dated Justin Timberlake is pretty darn desperate. Her comments were the act of an extremely unbalanced woman."

Blogger also pointed out that marrying an ex-mouseketeer is the moral equivalent of marrying the daughter of the frontman for a 1980's rock band. This is just one of the many hundreds of things that would exclude Miss (in a purely non-puritan way) Spears from consideration from any intelligent bachelor seeking long life and happiness.

For more confirmation of the fact that no such marriage took place, contact Blogger's publicist at mjbigger@juno.com.