Blogger Feeds Thousands

Blogger's law firm, Barker & Associations (no, the founder of our law firm was not a dog), had their annual community picnic.

The community picnic is designed to create community goodwill (for the law firm that seeks to put criminal defendants back on the streets) by giving out tons of free food. Free food, in the redneck central valley, means beef.

Of course, Blogger was assigned the task of cutting the beef. Assigned by a person that had no idea that Blogger was raised without a sign of meat in sight. In other words, blogger is a vegetarian.

Blogger relished the irony of cutting over a hundred pounds of beef, of rolling up his sleeves and changing gloves often because of the blood from the special request undercooked meat (some people call it "rare" but when half the people in town request it, it's hard to call it that with a straight face.)

Beef cutting is an art. The most important part of beef cutting (Blogger discovered quickly) is avoiding cutting off any extremities. He is proud to report that not once in the over one hundred pounds of beef that he cut, did Blogger slice off an extremity. This is a great accomplishment for someone of Blogger's absentminded ability.

Cheers to picnics.